I did not really sense anything going to the hospice this morning. I saw with a patient and meditated. After a while, I felt some emotion. I realized distrustful of my feelings and emotions, I had been walling them off. I asked Jesus’ light to fill me and opened myself out. The patient’s wife came. I went and sat with another.

He was restful until the nurse started giving him his meds. He became very restless. I sat with him, one hand resting gently on his shoulder, another placed where if he wanted to, he could grip it.

I began to feel strong emotions. I contained it until I was in the car, ready to drive back and found myself crying. The emotions released. I cried driving home, I wondered what it was about and realized death can be very painful. I had been so much on how awesome last moments can be, I failed to see the other side, how painful dying can be.

There are those dying in peace, their souls in peace and ready to move on. With these, they feel distant and I usually do not sense anything. I might sense a nice peaceful place. Now and again, I would pick up on emotions of those actively dying, but likely afraid to die, not wanting to die or have yet to accept dying. I believe that is when I pick up on their emotions.