Last night, lying in bed trying to sleep, it came to me I have not been filled with that bliss for some time now. That I actually was not in happy state of being. I had not even noticed it. I saw there are periods I am filled with bliss and holy. Periods like now where I am only too aware how human I am and full of flaws and attachment. I saw why holy people are humble. I have wondered about that because they have to realize they have attained a certain level of holiness yet they stay humble. I saw that is the reason why, they experienced both. And as St. John of the Cross wrote, times of bliss need not be good, times of darkness actually works like a file and purify us. In life, happy times are pleasant, hard times not so yet it is the hard times that are more effective in helping us grow.

I thought of eating something nice, that is bliss and having to eat something not so nice but good for health. The above is something like that.